Why Do I Do What I Hate?

Tough Questions. Real Answers.
Why Do I Do What I Hate?

I. Introduction

Romans 7:15, 18b, 19 (NLT) ¹⁵I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate. ¹⁸… I want to do what is right, but I can’t. ¹⁹I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway.

II. Why Do I Do the Things I Hate?

A. We have a Spiritual

John 10:10 (NLT) The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.

1. Temptation advertises pleasure but hides the price tag.

2. The contrast in John 10:

The thief offers life.

Jesus offers life.

B. Restraint Bias – We think we’re stronger than we are.

1. Hot-Cold Empathy Gap: Our tendency to dramatically overestimate our self-control when we’re thinking clearly (“cold”) and underestimate how much temptation will overpower us in the moment (“hot”).

2. Temptation rewrites while you’re living in it.

I Corinthians 10:12 (NLT) If you think you are standing strong, be careful not to fall.

3. Immediate reward overpowers future consequence.

C. Repetition Reduces – What begins as choice can become conditioning.

1. If I know I’m , wisdom means I stop pretending I’m .

III. Building Guardrails Before the Cliff

A. Move the

James 1:14 (NIV) But each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed.

1. Ask better questions: Is it ?

2. In light of my previous experiences, my current situation, and my future hopes and dreams, what is the wise thing to do? (Andy Stanley)

B. Magnify the Cost

1. Unless you see the , you won’t move the line.

2. Magnify the cost! Because private compromise eventually creates public consequences.

C. Plan Your Escape

Genesis 39:6b-7 (NIV) ^6bNow Joseph was well-built and handsome, ⁷and after a while his master’s wife took notice of Joseph and said, “Come to bed with me!”

1. Do not use your to justify your .

Genesis 39:10 (NIV) And though she spoke to Joseph day after day, he refused to go to bed with her or even be with her.

Genesis 39:11-12 (NIV) ¹¹One day he went into the house to attend to his duties, and none of the household servants was inside. ¹²She caught him by his cloak and said, “Come to bed with me!” But he left his cloak in her hand and ran out of the house.

IV. Conclusion

A. Shame Creates Cycles: Sometimes we don’t give in to temptation because desire overwhelms us. Sometimes we give in because shame already convinced us we’re broken.

1. Grace matters as much as it does spiritually.

Romans 7:24-25 (NIV) ²⁴What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? ²⁵Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!

Romans 8:1 (NIV) Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.